Day 365. That's a wrap.

And as the clock strikes midnight here ends this blog. Three hundred and sixty five photos each accompanied by a varying number of words.

On reflection my year looks pretty standard for a working Mum. Some highs and a few lows. Moments of excitement - gigs, restaurants, holidays and proud parenting - sitting alongside everyday chores and monotony.

I kind of lost my mojo after my Dad died in September and although I continued to take the pictures each day I often struggled to post them on here. But here they all are.

So this is me. 2013 forever captured in a series of snapshots taken on an iPhone. A moment in history. This is my life.

And I can honestly say I'm happy with that.

Happy New Year.

Day 364. Inside the wall.

We're ending the year with a trip to the North East. Three days in Winter, on the NE coast, with three children means finding indoor activities for when the weather is just too miserable for outdoor entertainment.

A trip to the local climbing wall seemed a good idea. It was left to me to find the number and a quick google brought up one in Byker with a kids training session available in the afternoon. Off we headed in two cars. When we arrived to confirm the booking it transpired we'd booked at a different centre because I'd mistaken the description of the place for its name.

Fortunately the other one was just a few minutes drive away otherwise we'd have missed our slot. Next time I'm asked to find the contact details for a venue I don't know, I think I'll just double check it's the right place before we head off...

These little monkeys (continuing the theme from yesterday's post) had a ball and the consensus was that this was actually more fun than the centre where you climb on ropes. And we got to head inside the Byker Wall which reminded me of a place in Liverpool close to where I grew up. Success, even if it was accidental rather than planned.

Day 363. Me and my girl, and a blanket.

Ever since she was a toddler Bea's done this in the car. While watching a film*, covered with a blanket, or coat or anything else she can use as a blackout. Each time it reminds me of orangutans. In captivity or rehabilitation they like to use blankets to protect them from insects, to sleep under or even to play hide and seek.

So here she is. My girl of the forest. Enjoying Harry Potter and possibly causing people in other cars to wonder what the hell she's doing. Unless they have kids too. In which case they may already know.

*If she watched The Elephant Man, she'd be a girl under a blanket, watching a man, under a blanket.

Day 362. A final 2013 visit.

To Cambridge.

I suspect 2014 will see my loyalties shift slightly towards Norwich. It's closer for a start and after heading there to do some Christmas shopping I fell a little bit in love with the place.

But for now, one last trip to a city that first won me over in the '90s. A place I've introduced my daughter to. Where I've laughed, cried, played, entertained, dined, shopped, shopped and shopped a little more.

I won't fully abandon its cobbled streets, the college backs and the glorious museums; it's just time to discover somewhere closer to home.

Day 361. Full house.

After two days of Christmas we've had a chilled day with a few of Bea's friends over to play. I love it when they come over as the house feels full and I can indulge the hopes I used to have of having a larger family.

Even when they've devoured a packet of jaffa cakes in world record speed and requested hot chocolate and cups of sweet tea after a trip to the park I'm not put off.

Full house. Just how I like it.

Day 360. One wafer thin mint.

After gorging ourselves on rib of beef and chocolate bread and butter pudding for lunch we really don't need anything else to eat. But it's Christmas. Well Boxing Day. So life must revolve around food, drink and general indulgence.

Just one sliver of pie and a small slice of ham? Go on then. And a bit of cheese. Perhaps another glass of wine. And a few crisps.

One wafer thin mint Family Creosote?

Boom!

Day 359. We Three Honeybones.

Breaking with tradition we're having a Spanish themed Christmas lunch although the musical accompaniment of "We Three Kings' played beautifully by Bea reminded us it's the 25th December and not just another Honeybone lunch.

Happy Christmas everyone.

Day 358. Baking day.

It's Christmas Eve so it must be time to bake. This morning I have sent Will off to work with a batch of Rocky Road and freshly baked sausage rolls. The house smells good enough to eat and for the first time since September I'm enjoying being in the kitchen. Today is all about delivering presents and homemade edible treats to friends around the area before heading home to begin preparations for our own family Christmas tomorrow. And yes, the sausage rolls were delicious.

Day 357. Naughty or nice.

The moment a feisty, argumentative, excitable, caring, funny girl discovers she's made it onto the nice list. The fabulous PNP (portable north pole) app means we can watch Santa talk her through her year and then await with great anticipation as the swingometer moves rapidly between the red zone for naughty and the green 'nice' zone before finally coming to rest on NICE!

Thank all things elfish for that.

Day 356. And finally.

We complete the decorating of our house. Pine cones, cinnamon sticks, branches from the fir tree in our garden and some sparkly lights. Simple and effective.

Is it time for a glass of wine now?

Day 355. Happy and sad.

As is usual in December we're receiving a lot of parcels. I opened one today to find a number of photos of my Dad. After crying several tears I was touched to find that he had kept some pictures of his wedding to my Mum. Only 2 people in this one are still alive - my Mum and my maternal Grandmother in turquoise.

There were also several photos of my Dad during his time with his partner Rita. Hard for me to believe they were together 18 years and yet I never met her or him during that time. At least I now have a clear image of how he looked in the years before he died and will one day soon add his image to the collection of family pictures around our house. But not just yet. It's still painful when I see him, even writing this post makes me teary. I don't really look like him but Bea with her blonde hair and blue eyes has clearly inherited his genes. She may never have met her other Grandad but I hope one day she'll learn more about him from her Uncle and her Aunt.

Day 354. Faultless towers.

School's out for Christmas. Half day today which meant I had time to take Bea to nearby Oxburgh Hall as the house was open to share Christmas through the centuries.

From pin the moustache on Hitler, minced meat pies and the history of decorations to Christmas (or lack of it) under Oliver Cromwell and beautiful hidden doors, it was a rather lovely way to begin the festive break. Unlike Bea I declined the offer to jump down the former privy into one of the few priest holes open to visitors but did enjoy the Queen's bedroom which was spacious and beautifully furnished. We were even entertained by the volunteers who danced for us in traditional costume in the King's Room, where Henry VII stayed with his queen, Elizabeth of York, in 1487.

 A climb to the top of the house rewarded us with this view from one of the towers and we returned home with rosy cheeks, carrying a bounty of passionfruit curd (from the NT shop) and a handful of historic recipes to try out.

Day 353. Perfect combinations.

The Matilda installation in Liberty is a wonderful amalgamation of two London treasures.

Love the show. Love the store. Both eclectic. A myriad of colour, style and formats.

Managed to embarrass myself beautifully by throwing a big smile to Rhod Gilbert after thinking I knew him. Thankfully Tim Minchin wasn't shopping here too. If he had been the Rhod situation would have been reduced to a minor blush rather than the full flushed face, mottled neck and burning ears. As you might have guessed I'm a big fan of Tim.

Matilda in Liberty. A perfect combination.


Quiet: From Matilda the musical


Have you ever wondered, well I have,
About how when I say, say, red, for example,
There's no way of knowing if red
Means the same thing in your head
As red means in my head
When someone says red?



And how if we are travelling
At almost the speed of light,
And we're holding a light,
That light would still travel away from us
At the full speed of light?

Which seems right in a way,
But I'm trying to say... I'm not sure...
But I'm wondering inside my head,
I'm not just a bit different from some of my friends...
These answers that come into my mind unbidden...
These stories delivered to me fully written...

And when everyone shouts - they seem to like shouting -
The noise in my head is incredibly loud,
And I just wish they'd stop, my dad and my mum,
And the telly and stories would stop just for once.

I'm sorry - I'm not quite explaining it right,
But this noise becomes anger, and the anger is light,
And its burning inside me would usually fade,
But it isn't today, and the heat and the shouting,
And my heart is pounding, and my eyes are burning,
And suddenly everything, everything is...

Quiet...
Like silence, but not really silent...
Just that still sort of quiet
Like the sound of a page being turned in a book,
Or a pause in a walk in the woods.

Quiet...
Like silence, but not really silent...
Just that nice kind of quiet,
Like the sound when you lie upside down in your bed.
Just the sound of your heart in your head...

And though the people around me,
Their mouths are still moving,
The words they are forming
Cannot reach me anymore.

And it is quiet...
And I am warm...
Like I've sailed
Into the eye of the storm...

Day 352. Christmas is coming...slowly.

Usually the house is decorated by the second week of December. The whole house. But this year it's taking a little longer to get things done.

At this rate we'll be hanging tinsel as we serve the turkey. Although we're not having turkey. And we don't have any tinsel.

We're a bit behind.

Before you know it we'll be taking it all down again.

Day 351. Better late than...

Journey to the North West hugely delayed by an accident near Nottingham. A sage reminder that it's better to arrive late than not at all.

Apparently it's also better to arrive late than ugly...

Day 350. It's the school pantomime. Oh no it isn't.

Oh yes it is...

This year Cinders, a variant of Cinderella where the ugly sister hooked the prince and Bea played a fairy Godmother.

It was as usual a mixture of scripted and improvised joy. The improvisation came in the form of the boy who sang with so much enthusiasm I missed at least 40% of the show just watching him, the girl who delivered her lines with such distain I imagined her as a 40 something has-been smoking fags in the wings and complaining that she'd trained for 7 years, for this, and my own prima donna overacting with a look of pure delight on her face that told me she was in her element.

The school Christmas play. Pleasure and pain rolled into one.

Day 349. The tree.

The day of the tree has arrived and here is its first adornment. Several days of decorating the house lie ahead but for now we're enjoying the scent of a real tree and the gentle twinkle of the lights from the corner. The setting which requires a warning for those suffering from epilepsy, not so much.

Day 348. Macarons & More.

Firstly I'm thrilled this isn't called More Than Macarons. My friend Andrew would be enraged if it was. Just ask him about More Than insurance, then stand back and watch him go.

I finally decided to do some Christmas shopping, in Norwich, with a clear list. Forty minutes in and I was still discovering the joys of the lanes when I found this place. Beautiful inside and out. £20 later and I had made my first purchase. Unfortunately it wasn't on the list and it wasn't a gift. Less than successful.

Next stop The Tannery, a place that assaults your nostrils with the most sensational leather aroma - again, no present purchased here. Just browsing, for me.

A jewellers, still in the lanes, was my next stop where I tried on an exquisite aquamarine ring. I managed to spend fifteen minutes of chatter with the assistant convincing myself I was thinking about my sisters. She knew. I knew. Presents on list - 0. Treats for the Honeybones - 4.

I did finally check my list and the enormity of my task kickstarted some action. All family presents were purchased, a few of them I'l be reluctant to hand over; work gifts were sorted and I gathered a few more ideas for my own wish list.

All in all, a pretty good day.

Day 347. Driving home for Christmas.

Or the road to hell? Chris Rea may possibly suffer from a bi-polar driving disorder but one thing's for sure, nobody is driving my car any time soon.

Off it goes to be assessed after yesterday's accident although I've already been warned the likelihood is it will be written off. 105,000 miles and I manage to skid on some mud on the road. Good job I haven't got to drive to Chester early next week in a Toyota Aygo. Oh wait, yes I do.

That'll be fun.

BTW. Today's date isn't lost one me.

Day 346. hArSTON.

I drive past the Aston Martin garage several times a month. It's the place of dreams. Mainly I dream that if I head inside the showroom I'll find Daniel Craig ordering his next Bond car but how likely is that? Me heading into the showroom, the DC part is totally feasible.

This section of my journey can only be improved upon if someone also happens to be test driving a cars as I pass through Harston. That throaty hum as it accelerates to the maximum speed of 30 miles per hour (it's a residential area...) creates a Pavlovian response and within a matter of moments I'm humming the Bond theme tune.

The day ended in a less than dreamlike state as I managed to crash my car. Time to pay a visit to the showroom?

Ah. Harston. An unlikely field of dreams.

Day 345. Christmas is coming...

... and I can't face getting ready for it so instead I'll stand in the street at dusk and take grainy pictures of the church opposite our house.

I thank you.

Day 344. My favourite app.

As the end of the year is now fast approaching I'm beginning to reflect and the Hailo app is most definitely one of my 2013 digital highlights. It's transformed my London travel and I totally love it. I suspect I wouldn't feel quite the same if I reflected on how much more I've spent on cabs as a result but it's my luxury item. Not on desert island discs obviously. The hailo app clearly would serve little purpose if I was stranded on a small land mass in the middle of the ocean. More useful might be a dune buggy. Or a glamping tent. A black cab? Not so much. Where would I fill up with petrol for a start?

Sorry, where was I? In a cab, with my app. No cash required.

Day 343. Birthday girl.

Birthday breakfast in Center Parcs, birthday tea with six friends at home and then cake at running club. It's hectic when you turn 9. For the parents that is. We bring it on ourselves of course. Parties with family, parties with friends, sweets or cakes for school. It's too much. And I love it.

Happy Birthday to the most precious person in my world. Worth every second of time, every ounce of effort and every penny spent.

Day 342. Sunset in the forest.

Another Center Parcs' day filled with swimming, cycling and messing about. Two happy girls. Two exhausted adults. And this fiery sunset to top it off. Truly has been a wonderful few days.

Day 341. Balls.

At Center Parcs for the annual 'Bea's birthday weekend' visit. This year we've brought Bea's best friend with us which is a revelation! Two children really is much easier than one. At least it is when one of them isn't yours.

Lots of cycling, swimming and messing about and then some down time painting ceramics. I hadn't planned to take part, instead thinking I'd sit on a sofa with a coffee while the girls got messy but the geeky kid in me took over and before you know it I was approaching the painting of a Christmas bauble with more precision and care than is appropriate for a 42 year old woman. Still it was therapeutic and the kids loved it too.

For everyone I was at school with; yes I'm still an anally retentive control freak and I'm happy with that.

Day 340. Memories of South Africa.

Woke up to news of Mandela's passing and took a few minutes to read some of the letters in this book.

I visited Cape Town when I worked at BT and it was quite a trip. Took a helicopter to lunch one day, a flight over the Cape of Good Hope and dinner at the President's House, situated at the foot of Table Mountain ( Thabo Mbeki wasn't there). Robben Island was one of the highlights of the trip and it was a humbling experience*. Reading this book I'm reminded of how I felt that day.

*I should just say it wasn't all culture and history; one night I drank so many vodka red bulls I was still wide awake by breakfast the next day. I also sang Diamonds are a Girl's Best Friend late one night with a pianist in the hotel lobby and later in the week sang Memories at the President's House dinner. It was a polarised trip... And I'm so lucky to have experienced it all.

Day 339. If my day's not all that.

Post a photo of my cat.

That's all.

Day 338. It's a wonderful life.

Now the festive season can begin. Officially. Yes, I know you were all waiting for me to give you permission to embrace the Christmas spirit...

Tonight, for the first time, I saw It's a Wonderful Life on the big screen at this truly glorious cinema we have in King's Lynn. A black tie/period dress event, we were welcomed with sherry and mince pies and even the pre-show adverts were those people would have watched when the film was originally released.

It was a delight to watch in a theatre. And I cried. Again. I always do and it was a joyous moment when everyone applauded at the end.

I'm now on a mission to engage more with The Majestic Cinema - vintage evenings are definitely the way forward for diversification.

And cheesy as it may be, it really is a wonderful life.

Day 337. Tired of London?

Never. There's always something new to catch your eye.

This decorative doorstep is just a few streets away from my office and I took a few minutes to have a quick chat with the two guys painstakingly laying the mosaic, in the cold. Each tile had been laid out on the glue backed paper by hand before being laid in place here. They were still beavering away several hours later. I must remember to head back and see it next time I'm heading out this way.

Day 336. Ugly on the outside. But not for long.

This is the unattractive rear of our house. Its days are numbered. Several loose tiles however need replacing before we get to demolition stage in a few years. Of course we wait until winter is almost upon us before securing the builders to make the repairs. At least now we have a roof that should weather any storms until the builders appear again.

Day 335. Into the light.

If you've ever watched the TV show Kingdom, this lane near our house was used several times during filming and on days like today it's hard not to be taken in by the beauty of this place. I may be a long way from home but this winning combination of distant mist, low sun and clear blue sky make it a little easier to bear.